Tuesday, October 26, 2010

A BLOODY MARY OR A BLOODY SHAME?

The construction of a real Bloody Mary cannot be sniffed at. I would take hours - if it took that long - stirring, dripping, toil and troubling if it meant that our terribly sweet and slightly dull tomato juice could be more than just sieved fruit.

I like a Bloody Mary to fix me, whether it be a hangover, tiredness or gloom. It needs to sting and flare my nostrils at first whiff, pinning my eyelids up to my brows as if sleep were forever forbidden. Or as if to warn other drinkers to tread lightly before taking a long slurp.
I'm cruel when it comes to pub pourers and brutal when it comes to home-concoctions...
So what goes into my Bloody Mary? The secret is I don't have a recipe - I pour by taste and mood and ALWAYS with 11 vital ingredients, all kittens and bows when served alone, ferocious when mixed together:
TOMATO JUICE; glassful of
HORSERADISH; spoonful of
CELERY SALT; sprinkling of
VODKA; gushes of
SHERRY; glug of
TABASCO; splashes of
BLACK PEPPER; crackle of
LEA IN PERRINS; dashes of
CELERY; stick of
SLICE OF LIME RUBBED ROUND RIM AND DROPPED IN; squeezes of
ICE; chunks of

...A bit of whoooaaaaa there nessy and...eye of newt, why not?
So here's a toast to the best Halloween cocktail around. We'll certainly be drinking it on the 31st, probably out of pumpkins, with devilled mackerel, and death by chocolate cake, just because we can - so if anyone has a recipe that they think tops the lot then please post below and I'll make - only bloody scary bloody mary's allowed. None of this tame stuff.

If it doesn't bite, it ain't right.

10 comments:

  1. I simply LOVE the idea of horseradish in the bloody mary! Just need one of those fake severed fingers hanging over the edge of the glass and you've got your halloween cocktail I say!

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  2. Scary stuff! I love a bloody mary, and this sounds on the money. It also sounds like this could kill any illnesses that are flying round at the moment. Can't wait to try this! x

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  3. Intoxicated just reading that - my lids firmly pinned to brows! x

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  4. What about a hot bloody mary? discuss... pizza topping?!

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  5. hardcore bloody mary drinkers add a raw egg - roawwwwwwww!

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  6. I love the idea of 'Lea in Perrins'. Sounds like a couple of gay policeman from the 1960s.

    You have done what food writing should do - criminally hungover but am now craving a bloody mary.

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  7. Haha. Shows you how long I hang around admiring the names of ingredients - nope. They go straight in and down the gullet. I will always call it Lea IN Perrins. SLurp. Bloody Marys kick of promptly at 3pm.

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  8. P.s Hot Bloody MAry sounds good - but will it ease the pain as well as a cold'n? I've heard of B. Mary soup before but I will never be better than the real deal. Great idea though. Raw eggs will come straight back up, I'm sure of it, but am up for the challenge! Merci very much for the comments.

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  9. poor perrins. didn't even have a choice

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  10. Country Living December has a Bloody Mary soup recipe - looks delicious...but no horseradish! xx

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